Snow Kissed - Chapter One

A blue moon, an extra full moon that randomly popped up on the astronomical calendar to make my life difficult, as if being a teenager wasn’t complicated enough. Lucky for me, the phrase, “once in a blue moon,” accurately described the frequency of my little, shall we say… condition?

Whatever you call it, it caused more trouble than a little for my parents and me. My parents discovered my condition when I was very young. If they hadn’t had a front-row seat on one such moon, I’d be in an asylum somewhere in Antarctica. There was just no way to explain it without sounding delusional.

Most nights of the year I was an average teenager. I had best friends, a secret crush, loved music and movies, and liked running. I spent my time hanging out with my friend’s or passing the hours studying at the library.

But once in a blue moon, I was anything but normal. I suppose since it was always inside of me, I wasn’t normal any time, but I liked to pretend I didn’t have a predatory animal hiding inside of me 364 days a year, lying in wait for that one glorious night of escape.

I’m sure you’ve read the make-believe stories of wolf shifters, werewolves if you prefer, but what you’ve read is not true. I used to believe my kind only existed in fairy tales, folklore, and fiction until I learned the truth. What I became on those nights was nothing compared to the story behind it. Little did I know I descended from royalty, living out a curse inflicted on me by a beloved character in fiction. But she wasn’t fictional, and she wasn’t nice. Not even close.

The story of my life is long and wrought with plot twists, deception and love, mystery and intrigue. But if I’m to tell you the story, I must start the night everything changed. The night I met him. The last, normal night of my abnormal existence. After that night, things happened so quickly I’m not sure I was fully present and aware for every moment.

It began the second full moon of December, the thirteenth full moon of the year, fulfilling its definition as a blue moon in every way. My parents prepared a larger than usual dinner, having learned the more I ate before I shifted, the less destruction I caused later. They weren’t fond of finding the stripped carcasses of woodland animals in our backyard after a night of ravenous feasting.

“It’s dropping below freezing tonight, so dress warmly, Calla,” my mother said, forgetting again that I wouldn’t need clothing until morning.

I listened to her instructions to ease her mind. The shift was as stressful for them as it was for me, so I did what I could to make it easier.

“I will. Don’t worry, Mom.”

My father entered the kitchen with a rolled-up newspaper, and the wolf in me tensed. I’m not sure why, since neither of them had ever hit me in my life, but the sight of the rolled newspaper made the dog react every time. He tossed it on the counter, and it fell open, the headline glaring at me. FARMERS ALL OVER TOWN PREPARE FOR FULL MOON.

The rest of the article described the measures local farmers and pet owners took to ensure their livestock and pets stayed safe overnight. I knew what my father implied, but no matter how hard I tried, I could not convince him I was not the culprit behind the savage slaughter of the local animals. He didn’t want to believe it was me, but the timing made it difficult not to assume.

“Dad, I’m telling you, it’s not me. It’s just a coincidence. You read about these things all the time. All kinds of animals get crazy on full moons.” I tried to reason with him once again, but he was one step away from locking me up in the basement until morning.

“Honey, even if you were slaughtering animals all night, I wouldn’t care. I’m just afraid someone will… oh, I can’t even think about it.” He fell into a chair, always a bit dramatic. He rubbed his temples to ease his frustration and worry. My mother sat beside him, matching his concern and bumping it up a notch.

“Calla, dear, we would die if something happened to you,” she said. “What if a farmer sees you and assumes you’re the one killing the livestock? You might get shot or worse!”

I had a hard time thinking of anything worse than getting shot.

I sympathized with their position but could never make them understand what the wolf inside me needed. I needed to run, to be let free to hunt, or the primal urge to do so would remain inside me, pushing me to the edge until I exploded in a frenzy on the next blue moon.

If that happened, well, there’s no telling what I might kill, a fact I learned the hard way after killing so many animals in one night, it took my father a day and a half to clear the backyard without suspicion. I would not allow myself to lose control that way again. There was no way to be sure I could control myself if I crossed paths with a human in that ravenous state.

“I’ll go up the mountain and stay there all night. There’s nothing but trees for miles. Not a single farmer in sight up there. I’ll be safe, I promise,” I said, eating more from my plate to convince them I wouldn’t eat everything in my path on the way up the mountain.

“I realize we can’t keep you penned up like a puppy, sweetheart. It’s just so difficult. We worry all night long, especially when you’re quiet.” My mother squeezed my hand, an attempt to soothe herself that didn’t work.

“Quiet?”

“You know, when you don’t howl to tell us you’re safe.”

I didn’t have the heart to tell her that wasn’t the reason I howled, but if it eased their minds, I would do it frequently.

“If I give you a howl every so often throughout the night, will that help?”

My father chuckled and shook his head.

“We love your howl, darling, but please be careful. It may reveal your location, and if there are hunters out who… I can’t. I love you. Be careful.” He kissed me on the top of my head and left the room. My mother stood and kissed me, then gave me a firm hug.

“Don’t mind him. He works himself into a tizzy these nights.”

I finished the last of my dinner and gathered my things in silence. I packed a change of clothes, my phone, and a few snacks in a bag I would leave hidden somewhere in the woods. I’d need everything in the morning when I shifted again. I learned the hard way to prepare. One too many mornings waking up naked, and I remembered to pack back-up clothing.

The creaky back door slammed on my way out, and the bite of the December air clamped down on my face. I checked my watch, an hour before nightfall. I had to hurry. I drove my car to the little hideaway I’d found one day, parked as far into the tree line as possible and covered it with branches. A futile act, but it made me feel better to think no one could see my car from the road, raising suspicions.

After a mile hike into the woods, I leaned against a tall pine. I felt the tingling in my toes and the tips of my fingers, indicating the impending shift. I tied a rope around my bag and hoisted it up the tree for safe keeping. As a precaution, I kept my necessities separate from my car in case it was found and reported. I didn’t want to talk to the police naked, or on some nights, covered with blood. I secured the rope just in time.

I tried to strip before I shifted but ran a little behind time, so my clothes ripped to shreds. I shook off the scraps of fabric and smelled something tasty right away. Ignoring my urge to find it, I moved farther up the mountain. I made a promise to my parents, and I intended to keep it.

Feeling the soft dirt beneath my paws and inhaling the aroma of fresh-cut pine made me feel free. I ran, and I ran, letting the wolf have her fun for a while. When I reached high ground, I raised my head to the moon and howled loudly for my parents. I pictured their smiling faces, the only two souls on earth who knew my truth.

I glanced around, sniffing the air for a nice deer or a few rabbits, but all I smelled was snow. It was coming and there would be a lot. Snow was helpful for hunting. As a white wolf, hunting was tricky, even though most of my prey was color blind. The large white void I created in the scenery was a dead giveaway and a good reason to run if edible.

I continued my run, hoping to find something over the next hill, perhaps on the other side of the mountain. Halfway there the snow fell, quickly blanketing everything in a cloud of white. And then I saw it.

A giant deer appeared in the distance, grunting and snorting in search of something green to eat. I crouched and studied the stag for a long time. I didn’t enjoy killing other animals. In fact, it was the thing I hated most about my transformation. I’d much rather eat a bowl of pasta and kick back watching TV all night, but such was life.

Just when I’d convinced myself to go for it, the wind shifted. My lungs filled with the scent of the deer, but behind his smell was something familiar, yet different and new at the same time. The deer also caught the scent, and he lurched forward, springing toward safety amongst a tangle of underbrush.

I chased him, not at all interested in searching for another one if he got away. When he erupted from the other side of the brush, I sprang out just beside him, but he darted to his left before I had a chance to topple him. He was fast, shooting around trees and jumping over logs, but I was faster. He made a quick right turn and one last lunge toward a thicket of blackberry bushes. I leaped into the air, catching his neck before he escaped.

I had to eat, there was no way around it, but I could do without the carnage. Once, my parents tried leaving raw meat out for me, but the animal instinct wouldn’t settle for it. I had to hunt. Sometimes it felt like I had two souls residing in the same body, one human and one wolf, both vying for dominance.

I let my mind wander as I snapped the deer’s neck. A quick death was my style. I didn’t play with my food, and I found it disgusting when other animals did. They say humans are sadistic, but I’ve seen animals do things to their prey that bordered on sociopathic.

I dragged the deer to a secluded area, so I could eat before exploring the mountain. I heard an unusual noise, a guttural rumbling nearby. My ears perked, homing in on the sound. The rumbling grew closer, a growl I assumed was a wolf of the actual, full-time variety. Try as they may, I never met a natural wolf I couldn’t handle, so I wasn’t concerned.

However, once he came into view, my heart stopped. Solid black, as large as me and dead-set on taking my meal. Once he was close enough, I lunged at him and snapped at his face. He fell back and repositioned, then came at me again, intent on ripping me to shreds at the gut.

My initial goal was defending my food, but if he wanted to play nasty, I could give him a run for his money. I dodged his gut-ripping teeth and jumped onto his back, sinking my own canines into his neck. He let out a howl, then a sharp whine. I loosened my grip, assuming he got the hint and would run off into the forest, but I misjudged him. He turned his head quickly and seized my foot in his teeth, shaking until I fell from his back. I recovered from the fall and limped toward the safety of the thicket.

I sensed him behind me. Rather than steal my food, he followed me toward the thicket, ready to attack me again. He didn’t want my food. He intended to kill me.

For the first time as a wolf, I was afraid of another animal. I turned quickly and crouched, ignoring the pain in my foot. I bared my teeth and growled as threatening a growl as possible. I exerted as much confidence as I could muster, but it did me no good.

He sprang at me again, grasping the back of my neck in his strong jaws. I yelped and tried to pull free, but his grip made it impossible. I stretched my neck forward and bit him on the chest, then pulled and shook my head until he couldn’t bear the pain.

He let go of my neck and howled again. I took advantage of his position and shoved him down. He fell onto his side but scrambled to get up again before I seized the opportunity to attack. I sprang forward, pushing him onto his back with a shove of my head. I was about to sink my teeth into his jugular when another wolf came out of nowhere. It ran straight into me and knocked me to the ground.

The new wolf was smaller, grey and white, with a nervous energy that radiated from him. He was quick and darted around like a boxer trying to wear down his opponent. While my attention was on him, the black wolf attacked, quickly flipping the situation in his favor. I struggled to get out from under him, but it was no use. His teeth glistened in the moonlight. His eyes sparkled, reflecting the moon in each orb.

Our eyes locked for a moment before he leaned in to take the last bite. My own eyes grew wide, staring into the deep pools of blue that stared back at me. The world slowed to a near stop, everything around me disappearing until all I saw were those blue eyes.

Whatever occurred between us, whatever the feeling was that took over my senses, was also affecting him. He lifted his head to get a better view of me, tilted it this way and that, and observed my reaction. He took a few steps back and allowed me to get up.

Deep in the back of my mind, I knew I should kill him while I had the chance, but something about his eyes made me pause. I faced him, nose to nose with mere centimeters between us. We studied each other for several seconds until it dawned on me. It seemed to grab him in the same instant.

His eyes were human. He was like me.

At once, a million emotions flooded over me. Question after question popped into my head, none of which I could ask, nor could he answer in our wolf state. The grey wolf came to his side, confusion in his bright eyes. My gaze shifted to him, deep brown eyes the same color any wolf might have, yet indescribably different. He was human, too.

They were hungry and scared. It was clear from the way they fought and defended each other, but they were lucky. They didn’t know what they had. The thing they had that I never did—each other.

I was alone. Not a soul in the world understood what I went through, but that could change. I was thrilled, but before I could make a gesture of peace, a loud noise echoed through the trees.

Gunfire startled us all, and the two of them darted toward the thick underbrush. I glanced at the moon, surprised to find it was far later in the night than I’d realized. Morning would soon break, and I would be stark naked in the middle of the forest with two boys roaming around, not to mention whoever fired the shot. The shot was far off, and I had no intention of killing something and not eating.

I knew they were hungry and wouldn’t find food before dawn. I scanned the forest and listened. One of them panted in the distance, so I whined. The panting sound grew closer until I saw the black wolf poke his nose from behind a thick pine. I nosed at the deer. They had something I wanted, and as a show of good faith I hoped they understood, I offered to share my food with them.

The black wolf inched out, ears flicking forward and back, eyes scanning the trees for danger. I didn’t have time to insist, so I ate. Much to the apparent dismay of the black wolf, the grey one jogged over and sunk his teeth deep into the shoulder of the deer. After a few minutes, the black one took a chance and wandered over to join the feast. He scanned the trees after every bite, seemingly in a constant state of alertness.

Once there was nothing but bone, the black wolf whined and ducked his head, the only way to thank me for my help. I gazed at the moon. I had to hurry. When I lowered my head, the wolves had disappeared. I couldn’t hear or smell them any longer, which was also a good sign I should head back to my car. The loss of my amplified senses was the first sign of the human shift. My tingling extremities, the second.

I ran hard and fast down the mountain. I heard gunfire again, closer than before. It startled me, and I forced myself to run harder. I arrived just in time, my paws tingling with the telltale signs of the shift. I was panting hard when I came to a stop under the tree. I shifted back to my human form with ease and dressed quickly before getting into my car. As usual, I was ready to go home to wash the stink of dog from my skin.

After leaving the forest, all I thought about were the two wolves, both like me, possibly holding a key that could unlock the mysteries of my life. Who am I? What am I? Where did I come from?

As I drove along the winding road, my mind settled. If it was the last thing I did, I would figure out the identity of the two wolves who introduced themselves into my life in a very painful way. My mother would freak out if she saw the wounds on my arm and neck, but at least I survived. At the end of every blue moon that was all that mattered.

After a quick shower, I was on my way out the door for a torturous day of school with no sleep. It was one issue I had yet to find a solution to. One would think my parents would be accommodating and allow me to stay home from school to sleep, but alas, my mother was a stickler when it came to education. I doubted she’d let me stay home even if I had my arm ripped off during the fight that night.

I parked my car in the lot, exhausted but driven by the motivation to figure out who the others were. They could be anyone, old or young. I wasn’t sure how I’d gained the condition myself, so there was no way to determine who else had it, if anyone. As I passed person after person, I wondered just how many of us existed. Only three? Dozens? Hundreds?

I dodged my best friends at our usual meeting spot and got to class before the bell rang. I was always jittery the first few hours after the shift, and I needed the time to reorient myself to being human. Luckily, I wouldn’t have to worry about the never-ending barrage of questions about my mood or sudden exhaustion from either of my friends that day. Both were going on a field trip I wanted to attend but decided against since I wouldn’t learn a single thing in my tired state.

I worked my way through my classes, surviving on coffee and chocolate-covered espresso beans until my last one. Trigonometry. Fantastic, the most boring class in the history of boring classes. It didn’t help that Mr. Carlson had a deep monotone voice that drove me crazy on a typical day, let alone the kind of day I’d already had. To keep my mind alert and my eyes open, I thought about the other wolves and devised a plan to find them.

It was a waste of my time. There wasn’t a plan in the world that could prepare me for what happened five minutes before last bell.

Mr. Carlson asked us to pass homework sheets down the row, and when I turned around to give the papers to the boy behind me, I saw the same blue eyes I’d seen the night before. There was no mistaking them. The dark blue was vibrant and sparkled the same as the black wolf’s had. He looked back at me confused and probably wondering why the girl in front of him, who had never said a single word to him before, was staring at him as if he were an alien. I let my gaze drop slightly and saw scratch marks peeking out from the collar of his t-shirt, fresh marks still raw and red.

“Hey, hurry and pass the papers, Calla,” the girl behind him said, leaning around him to see what the hold-up was.

I shook my head to break my gaze from his. I dropped the papers on his desk and quickly turned around, my heart pounding. I wasn’t prepared to find him so fast, maybe not ever. What were the odds we not only shared a class, but he sat right behind me all the time?

I felt a tap on my shoulder. I sucked in a breath and squeezed my eyes shut. You can do this. You can do this.

I turned around slowly and made eye contact with him again. His eyes widened when they connected with mine, then they slowly lowered to look at my wrist. When he saw the faint bite marks there, he gasped, then looked back to my eyes. My lips parted, and a breath escaped, but no words. All I could do was nod to confirm the question I saw in his eyes. His own jaw went slack, and he leaned forward to speak, but the bell rang, causing us both to jump.

He glanced back at me, then quickly gathered his things and darted from the classroom, leaving me in his dust. No matter, now that I knew who he was there was no way I was ignoring him. Nope, Marcus Fisher had some explaining to do.